In friendships and relationships, I started to notice the same patterns repeating. Over time I began to realise my role in those patterns. The reading I'd been making of those situations only had room for one perspective: mine. The people-pleaser part of me kept pushing down what I actually felt, and the peacekeeper kept smoothing things over. And things weren't being done to me — I was choosing, without realising, what story to tell myself about what was happening.
Once I could see it, my focus shifted. The question that mattered now was: what story am I telling myself, and what purpose is that story serving?
The training revealed much more about me than I expected. The mix of confidence and self-doubt — how I held myself to a standard high enough that I was regularly falling short of it. The way trying too hard in my own friendships had been leaving me disappointed. My own therapy alongside the training showed me that the quality I'd been calling overthinking was actually thoughtfulness, and that it could be put to use.
When I was a housemistress in a girls' boarding house, I'd see girls heading down to the school counsellor and find myself curious about what was happening in that room — what let someone walk out feeling lighter than when they walked in. That curiosity is what eventually took me into training to be a psychotherapist.
Integrative training took me a long way, but I started to feel I needed more. IFS gave me the map I'd been missing — the recognition that we have many parts, each with its own concerns. What I particularly love is the compassion the model fosters, toward yourself and toward others. The bus analogy still helps me explain it: the goal we work towards is for parts to be the passengers, and for Self to be the driver. Recognising who's in the driving seat at any given moment turns out to be invaluable.
Earlier in my career I worked with students and staff at the Centre for Wellbeing, University of Surrey, was part of the counselling teams at Godalming and Guildford Colleges, and volunteered for the Rape and Sexual Abuse Support Centre (RASASC) in Guildford.
*BACP accreditation goes beyond basic membership — it requires evidenced post-qualification practice, ongoing clinical supervision, and continued professional development. The BACP (British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy) sets and regulates ethical standards for the profession in the UK.
Accredited Member of the BACP (no. 342742)*
MA Integrative Counselling & Psychotherapy, University of Roehampton
Internal Family Systems (IFS) — trained to Level 3 (the highest level currently offered)
10+ years in private practice
In regular clinical supervision
Credentials
What I’m like when we work together…
When working together, I am warm, direct, and I like a touch of humour at times. Most of all I pay close attention. I'll ask you questions you might not have asked yourself, and notice things you've said or felt that might be worth coming back to. If you like the idea of working with IFS, we begin to notice the parts of you that come up in certain situations, and get to know them better. You always set the pace.